During the holiday season, pay special attention to the following 8 warning signs and consult the services of an aging specialist if there is cause for concern. Need help locating a specialist? Contact our Community Resources and Consultation Team by calling (713)660-1376 or email Sally Davis at sdavis@amazingplacehouston.org.

1. Uncharacteristic Confusion

Confusion is one of the hallmark symptoms of dementia. While we all experience confusion at times due to stress, lack of sleep, or navigating life’s demands, the key word here is “uncharacteristic.” The types of confusion to look out for include forgetting a close family member’s name or being disoriented when it comes to time or place. For example, you may notice your loved one putting items, like their phone or keys, in unusual places such as the freezer or the trash.

2. Mismanaging Money

Mismanagement of finances is another warning sign that makes the top of the list. This can be difficult to notice if your loved one is reluctant to ask for help or is unaware that they are making financial mistakes. Listen to conversations where your loved one may admit to being recently scammed. Pay attention if there are stacks of unpaid bills, especially if bills were previously paid on time and this is a clear departure from the norm. Also, notice if your loved one has any difficulty paying at stores or restaurants.

3. Withdrawing from Activities and Hobbies

Those experiencing early signs of dementia may unintentionally begin to self-isolate and withdraw from their regular activities such as going to church, gardening, or attending their regular book club meetings. While there may be many reasons for this behavior, oftentimes it is due to the fact that the activity is no longer enjoyable. It can also be a matter of forgetting the days and times of events. In addition to withdrawing, pay attention to see if there are any noticeable changes when it comes to household upkeep or maintenance. For example, your loved one may have stopped mowing the lawn and the yard is looking unkept or your loved one is no longer making their special holiday cookies anymore.

4. Getting Lost in Familiar Places

There is nothing to be alarmed about if someone gets lost in a place they have only been to a couple of times. What should be cause for alarm is if your loved one cannot remember how to get to the hair salon they have gone to for years, or how to return home from the grocery store nearby. Pay attention to conversations about getting lost recently, especially if it involves a familiar place. If your loved one is still driving, do you notice them making wrong turns or exhibiting any other uncharacteristic driving behavior such as an inability to identify street signs?

5. Repeating the Same Question or Difficulty Finding the Right Word

It is typically very noticeable if your loved one keeps asking you the same question repeatedly, especially within a short timeframe. While it can be quite annoying to be on the receiving end of the same question over and over, pay attention to how you respond. For example, responding with phrases like, “You just asked me that!” often leaves a person feeling embarrassed or ashamed. Instead, try to be patient and set up a quiet environment to have a conversation with your loved one after the holidays. If you notice that your loved one is struggling to find a word mid-sentence, gently supply the word for them. This will ease their frustration.

6. Finding it Hard to Make Decisions

Has your loved one always dressed to the nines and now they seemingly can no longer match clothes? Is your loved one, who is known for being punctual, now taking forever to get ready? Those experiencing early signs of dementia often have difficulty making decisions. Pay special attention if a loved one is taking a long time to make a decision, such as what to order at a restaurant or what present to gift a family member.

7. Difficulty with Holiday Traditions

The holidays offer an opportunity to check in with family and friends. Pay attention to see if your loved one is having difficulty with a holiday tradition they have observed for many years. For example, you may notice they have forgotten how to cook a familiar holiday recipe, or they need a refresher when it comes to the rules of a favorite game. Your loved one may also have trouble decorating for the holidays, putting up lights, shopping, or perhaps, they forgot to make that special dessert they bring every year without fail.

8. Change in Mood or Personality

Individuals with dementia may exhibit changes in mood or personality, which is most often expressed in the form of resistance, irritability, anxiousness, and suspicion. Suspicion often arises when your loved one has misplaced something and suspects someone else is responsible. Fear and paranoia can be all-consuming. Common tasks like reading a bank statement can cause lots of anxiety if your loved one is no longer able to understand the numbers. Activities that were once joyful, like playing with the grandkids, are often overwhelming for someone with dementia and may cause irritability. Overall, your loved one may seem more self-absorbed or less caring but remember that these changes are often beyond their control.

Helpful Tips

• Always be reassuring and supportive if you suspect your loved one may have dementia. It is often normal for a family member with dementia to get defensive and anxious. Offer to help in areas that you can like driving or grocery shopping. Plan to have the conversation to get help during a quiet time after the holidays.
• Ask a spouse or living partner of your person of concern if they have noticed changes such as not paying the bills on time or getting lost.
• If you have recognized multiple symptoms, schedule an appointment with a specialist such as a gerontologist, neurologist, or other aging specialist. An accurate diagnosis requires specialized assessments due to the complex nature of dementia.
• Do not point out mistakes during the holiday season unless you feel there is a safety issue.
• If family members are not able to gather, try to Facetime or Zoom and ask to see the house, Christmas tree, their meal, kitchen area, etc. to check on them.

If you have a concern about your loved one, please contact our Community Resources and Consultation Team by calling (713)660-1376 or email Sally Davis at sdavis@amazingplacehouston.org.